Smooth Retirement "Exit Strategy"

Smooth Retirement "Exit Strategy"

By BTrue2you

How to go when it's time

To reach your goal and not know what to do with your rewards. How could this happen to me. As I neared this golden goal, I unlike so many before me, realized that I had no exit strategy. How did this happen to me of all people, no way, not me. Maybe I never realized I would get it. How did I attain this goal.

As I reminisce on the years, I see the neat hairstyle, always shaped, perfect in all ways regardless of the weather and believe it or not, it was all natural. The physique, the styles, the swagger, the confidence and the pride of knowing that I was the best of the best in my field. My suits, perfect fits, matching ties for each day of the month, wing tip shoes, freshly polished each and every day, remember (spit shine).

The ups, the downs, the trials and tribulations but continuing to struggle to reach the top before someone else on my level. The disappointment, the heart break when others got the nod for the promotion I knew I should have received. The re locations, resettling the family, moving, starting all over again every three years but yet maintaining the optimism that it was for the best and yes I would get the promotion. As I demonstrated my dedication and devotion, never missing a day, taking partial days for the births of my three children, never a complete day. The sorrow, the heart ache, the tears of loosing loved ones, but I continued to strive for that goal, nothing could stop me, friends, family, co-workers, injury, hurt, sickness, "nothing could stop me, nothing".

Was it dedication or foolishness? Was it commitment or was it being stupid? Two times I asked myself this question?. 1. I removed myself from the hospital and went to work because someone said they needed me there yet to return to the hospital the following night but never missing a day of work. 2. Being at work when my father died and continuing to work until the day of the funeral. There were other times when I justified my commitment, dedication, and loyalty to the company without any regards to family or friends. My mission"THE GOAL".

Through the wrinkles I now see the weariness, the wear and tear on my body from the 15 to 20 hour days that I worked because of my so called dedication, commitment and loyalty to the company as I chased the rabbit that was on the goal post. I vacated the family for months at a time as I chased that rabbit, trying to reach my goal. With that in mind I relocated in 2000 with the promise that my goal was here in another state. Being a supportive family as they were my wife and kids had no alternative except to follow. Being teens, it was really tough on my two sons, being a freshman and junior in high school and leaving their friends. My daughter was equally hurt because it was her last year at her elementary school and she really wanted to don the cap and gown and graduate with her peers. But wait, their lives had to put on hold again, the goal was in sight, and the reward had been all but promised to me.

As for my children, they adapted very well and went on to greatness. The rabbit that I chased for so many years turned into a wolf that tried to devour my very existence. My commute was 112 miles round trip per day, 18 hour days and the rabbit that I had chased for so long had turned into a wolf that was now chasing me. The chase or the hunt continued daily, to the extent that I was afraid to go home with fears that the wolf would finally get ahead of me and devour me with his great sharp fangs and claws that drew blood with each strike. The wolf stuck a deep wound each and every day and at the time when I had bleed mentally and physically as much I could he moved in for the kill.

Prior to striking the devasting blow, he called two other wolves into the feast to enjoy the gourmet treat that he had prepared. As he and the other two celebrated their victory I reflected on the past. This was so clear, it was almost as if the recollection of one's life when they are drowning, everything was so real. I knew it was over, the rabbit, the goal, the fame, the prestige, the authority and the other benefits that came with it.....,all gone...

The tailored suits, the wing tip shoes, the elaborate ties, white shirts, the stylish hair, manicured nails...all gone. The goal....gone..taken away.. just like that. But wait I was near another goal, one that I could reach, if only I could get my health back that I had compromised during this perilous time. If I could gain my weight back, granted the hair loss would never return but get the blood pressure in check, control the diabetes, get an overdue physical and get myself together I could reach the ultimate goal....retirement... I was so close but didn't realize it because of the distractions and disappointments that I was going through. Yea, i MADE IT.. But now that I'm here, how do I do it. I have now worked seven months past retirement because I had no exit plan and still don't have one. I pray each day that I don't do anything stupid and get fired. 'ALL I HAVE TO DO IS RETIRE', IT HAS BEEN SO SIMPLE FOR SO MANY, WHY IS IT HARD FOR ME, I HAVE NO EXIT ROUTINE. IF YOU CAN HELP ME, PLEASE DO SO, GIVE ME ADVICE, HELP ME, THIS HAD BEEN A LIVING....

Not knowing I have reached another goal, not the one that I was chasing, but one more important.. Even through all the turmoil, I have never missed a day in 35 years of employment and thus I have a great retirement plan but don't know how to leave my job. Not the one I wanted, not the one I strived for, not the one that I sacrificed for, not the one I neglected my family for, but yes I can retire, "HELP ME". What would you do? Help me? Am I being true, BTrue2You, if not no one else will.